Category: News and Views
I can't decide if this is a joke or the dumbest thing I've ever read. If it's a joke, then lol, I guess. If this is serious, then WTF? I've never met a sighted person who could see if their ass was clean. Surely people aren't stupid enough to really think we can't wipe our asses properly.
Link to ridiculous story
Aw, crap. My link isn't working. Hold on... I'm working on it...
Screw it. I don't know why that didn't work. Here's the story. I've never heard of this Dead Serious News website. I'm assuming it's an Onion rip off. Anyway...:
New tool helps blind people with toilet cleanup
July 19, 2010 by Dead Serious News
“How do blind people know when they’re done wiping?” mused a comedian during his stand up performance. If you’re visually impaired, knowing when you’re done wiping is no laughing matter. Wipe Advisors LLC think they have the answer to that age old question.
The “WA Wand” will help blind people know when their bottom is clean. The user just places the WA Wand under their bottom and pushes a button. The newly patented product uses tones to indicate whether more wiping is needed. It is also possible to customize the tones with MP3s if so desired. A vibrate mode is available for use in public restrooms.
The WA Wand has a suggested retail price of $199.
I sure as hell hope this is a joke. What worries me is all the sighted people who will see this article and assume blind people really do need help wiping themselves. I've answered some pretty stupid questions in the past, but thank God, no one ever asked me how I know when I'm done wiping.
Lol just when you think people can't possibly think of anything more stupid... they prove you wrong.
Lmao this can not be real. it just can't.
agrees with rissa, just lmao.
Well, if you Google around it seems how we know when we're done wiping seems to be quite a popular question for sighted people to pose about us. Yes, they tend to ask it of each other, but I'm not sure if they're all being absolutely serious or not. Still, I expect if any of these folks ever go blind this concern will drive them to distraction if it's such a big deal whilst they're still fully sighted. Hahahaha!
I could honestly understand how this might help someone who's severely mentally retarded to gain some independence, but a blind person? Sometimes, I wonder if the sighted have their brains completely removed at birth or if it's a gradual process. Maybe, we should make a mock item for the sighted intended on giving them some common sense.
I saw this...this is no joke I am afraid. This just makes me angry.
This definitely sounds like a joke to me. But a few years back, I do remember some sighted idiot wanting to make a toilet for the blind, that would make sure blind folks never had to search for the toilet paper again, and would help blind men aim properly, etc. that was not a joke, so someone trying to invent something like this wouldn't be that far out of reach.
Well, I do think that they should have something to help us find the paper towl and soap dispensers in public toilets. I hate it when they put them in totally unstandard places and I have to stumle around looking for them.
lol at post 11. just lol!
love posts 9 and 12, totally agree.
but yeah... this wand thing is stupid!
i'm sure we havon't heard the last of stupid inventions.
Wow, what happened to my spelling/keyboard? Anyway, I'm sure you're right. Some people actually have misguided ideas, some like creating novelties and some just like to make a quick buck and pray on other's perceptions. But as has been said, I'm concerned for the sighted people who see this and actually think that blind people really need it. Talk about a step backward!
Don't shoot me, but I laughed for 5 minutes about this. I mean damn you're in the public toilte with the MP3 attachment do you get a female, or male voice, or is that an option? Will it speak different languages, accents? voice or male and what does it say? "Your ass is clean now?" You know how it echos in a big bathroom sometimes and well just. hahahaha. On top of that it cost almost $200 and what do you do with if after wiping, slap it in your purse, or backpack? It's to expensive to not keep and well. Does it shoot water like an English Kabidit? *sigh sorry just made me laugh.
you never know, not many people may use it. someone blind could be told about it and think, oh.... i really don't need that. then if no one bought the item, it would be a waste of time. think about that. lol
I think the wand sparked from the following:
toilet for the blind!
I mean:
this link
I don't understand why people think it is so hard for a blind person to wipe. I wipe the same as I did when I had sight. Why would you want to look at it anyway?
What retarded people
The Dead Serious News website is satire, the whole thing, so this whole story is not to be believed. Go to the main page and look at their About link.
The problem with sites like this is that they don't put disclaimers at the bottom of their pages. So if you don't go to their about pages, you'd never know it was satire, specifically because there really are such stupid people in the world.
Yes but said stupid people do have their heads up their ass, so, a. they probably do see what they wipe, and b. it's really hard for them to read web pages. I mean where would you put the monityr? Up against their belly and hope it's transparent?
Putting a disclaimer at the front of a satirical website would sort of ruin the fun of it for me. We can give the writers of this article credit for getting a reaction out of blind people who thought it was for real, and sometimes that's the intent of satire. You want to get people reacting and thinking and talking about something without necessarily being so obvious that one's leg's being pulled. As for what sighted people may or may not think if they saw such a thing, I don't know how they could just randomly stumble upon it. To my way of thinking, most sighted people do not purposely seek out anything having to do with blindness or blind people. We're one of many many groups people file in the "does not compute" category along with any disabled or mentally ill people, people with different economic backgrounds, people from far-away lands, people of different religions and cultures and traditions, etc. We're out of sight and out of mind unless somebody directly has to interact with us. We're one of those groups of people that those who see themselves as "normal" believe they just don't need to know anything about as they live blissfully ignorant lives.
You're right on the sattire. BonsaiKitten.com anyone? That site isn't up anymore but man oh man was that a laugh when it was. Apparently the pictures could fool the easily and not-so-easily fooled but my hat's off to the MIT guy who did it. All the Peta propaganda references were completely and thoroughly intact References to animals as ornaments and furniture and the like.
More than one animal rights activist acquaintaince of mine sent a flaming letter around on that one, and it was because of them I even saw the site. One night when a bit buzzed I wrote one of them back thanking her for showing me the site, and told her how entertaining it really was, she pledged to "never ever contact me again!" And she's kept said pledge, but the universe hasn't really changed.
Here's another satirical site which ahs fooled some people. Ever see the one from Landover Baptist Church? It's an obvious spoof of websites with a fundamentalist point of view. I think there was even some buzz about it right here on the Zone when somebody saw an article there claiming that Braille was the devil's alphabet or some such thing. It's total parody and satire on the outrageous claims fundamentalists can make. Not taht real fundies can come up with some high-caliber WTFery. Does jesus-is-lord.com still exist? Then there's a site I found called Fundies Say the Darnedest Things where they find some of the msot outrageous things written on Christian websites and post them on the site for comment.
I must give those religious ones to an atheist friend of mine. She'll be sure to red for hours and laugh her head off. I suppose you guys are right and that's a very interesting way of looking at things. Normally, I'd say that it isn't a good idea to go so far with things, but it just might make others more interested in more serious questions. Okay, a blind person can obviously take care of him/herself in the bathroom, but how does he/she find a bathroom in a public place? That sort of thing. Godzilla, I have to say that your view of the sighted world is very grim. It seems as if no one cares about anyone but themselves, no one is curious and no one would even take the time to say hello to anyone who's different from them. While I'm sure there are some people like that, and while I too am disturbed by all the superficiality today, I honestly can't take such a negative view on things. It's part of human nature to be curious about people who are different, wehther they speak a different language, have a disability or even wear different clothing from anything you've ever seen. So I'm sure some sighted people can stumble across sites about us and might stop to read.
I'm sorry if I came off negatively. I dunno if there's a difference between a cynic and a pessimist, but I tend to be cynical, and there's always lots of room for my impressions to be wrong. Now, I don't think people are self-involved in any extreme sense, but they can tend to be at least somewhat because people feel most comfortable around the familiar. People may be curious about others but they can also tend to see anyone different or outside the norm as mysterious and sort of exotic or alien. My point also is that we as blind people can tend to over-react if we suspect we are being portrayed inaccurately. I would hope there are some sighted folk who would see the article and see it as satirical and get the joke. Anyone who would take it seriously is probably not anyone worth dealing with if you think about it, yes?
Lol. I just couldn't totally convince myself that this story was real. Glad to hear for sure that it's not. Still, it is disturbing to think that people would actually believe wiping is an issue for blind people. But, if someone is that stupid, then I don't want to be bothered with them anyway. Also, I think Godzilla's take on people is quite accurate and very well said. I don't see it as negative, just very realistic based on my interactions with people. Of course, I tend to be very synical as well.
Like I said, if you Google, it seems sighted people tend to ask one another, I suppose as a joke, how "a blind person" knows when they're done wiping. I don't know why the question seems so common, but I urge any of you to go to Google and put the phrase "how does a blind person" and put it in quotes and see how often the question of wiping occurs. Could be just people's attraction to bathroom humor, I don't know, but if our bathroom habits are so alien and exotic, it blows the mind what people think we do otherwise. I mean, hell, people have asked if blind people have sex, as if there is a notion that we just don't or can't.
Well I find it funny and I think that anyone who has had sight and gone blind would understand. Even a sighted person that has sense knows you don't have to look to wipe. Think about it people how would you? Rubber necking just got a new term. Lol. Their are no mirrors in the toilite area of the bathroom, so it be hard. You'd have to look at the paper each time right and who'd be that interested? Even for the sighted it's a feel thing, or they must wash. I think this will always be on the internet silly things and when reading internet pages one should read with a grain of brain? If not that's their problem and me I get a good laugh. Smile.
I think one of my favorite stories was the one about the baptist church being remade in to the world's largest gay bar. Surely anyone who read such a thing would know that it had to be a joke, but...
I saw this infomercial for the wiping wand. It boasts:
"Never touch dirty toilet paper again!"
This is about as rediculous as the vibrating toilet I've heard, made specifically for blind persons.
But, it has been suitable for a laugh. :)
I actually did find something similar on Youtube, only this one makes perfect sense. It's not designed for the blind, but rather, for those with limited mobility in their arms and shoulders. It's called the Freedom Wand.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zmbKgeccHjM
It can be used for wiping, for shaving, for applying makeup or ointment or in the shower as a washing aid. Personally, I think the shower idea is great, since most people can't reach their backs as well as this device can. But I couldn't imagine using the same one for the latter things and for wiping... Yuck. Still, I'm glad that someone developed a tool to help people gain back their independence.
A vibrating toilet? How exactly was that supposed to be helpful?
lol I was wondering the same thing.
How interesting.
rofl, lol, haha. The people at that site are really doing their jobs . I got a good laugh out of this. The funny thing is, some people might totally believe we might need something like this.
hopefully not, but ya never know.
I suppose a vibrating toilet could keep you entertained for these long sits?
the sad thing is is that some sighted people really do think this is an issue...
I hope this company is prepared to lose money though.
I hope the company goes under because they are just ignorant.